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I remember when I first moved to this country, I realized how unaware a majority of the people I encountered were of the extent of slavery. Where I’m from, we learned how many ships came, the years, major battles, the whole works. At times, I was told I was lying when I explained to my American peers how Indians ended up in Jamaica (through indentured slavery) which baffled me that the truth was so foreign to them.
I took the initiative to learn more about the history. I took classes such as African American Literature and Philosophy and it unveiled many painful accounts of injustices, murders, isolation and brutality. I became angry. I lost sleep. I lost weight. How could I fix this? How can I help? How do I operate in this world that was fashioned to be counterintuitive to our humanity? This was systemic. This was deliberate. This was happening in a way that we have become desensitized to - through pay structures, profiling, mental training. The state of the country that I was now a part of robbed me of my sanity and happiness for a very long time because I did not want to wake up to a place like this every day.
But I had to find a way to go on. It forced me to learn how to exercise the art of letting go (still learning) and acknowledge that I cannot take the pain of the world personally. Even if I still feel burdened to bear that weight at times. No matter how good my intentions are, I cannot change the past and I cannot control others. I can only hope that in being authentically myself, others can give themselves the space to be unapologetic about their truth. And so, in lieu of what is happening today, I encourage you to find your reasons that save you - on a daily basis, through your lowest lows and your peaks of pain and anger. I will share with you, mine:
That feeling of familiarity and warmth when you realize you share a similarity with someone.
The way your children’s laughter is so sincere and infectious that you echo it reflexively.
The love you feel in your fingertips when you touch your partner’s face.
The impenetrable sense of security and calm you experience when the universe shows you signs that you are on the right path, especially after many failures.
The human magic that sends your hair on end when you feel wholly seen, loved and appreciated for things you thought no one noticed.
When you are overwhelmed with love for someone as they perform an action or as they're passionately beaming while sharing their thoughts.
The glimmer in someone's eyes when we demonstrate empathy and support to make them feel less isolated.
That feeling of total satisfaction when a piece of information completes an idea or picture in its entirety.
That sense of gratitude when someone is able to trust you with their truth - the good, the bad and the ugly.
The smell of the rain as it first touches the earth - a divine and palpable reminder that change is always in the air, good or bad, whether or not we are ready for it.
These are the gentle reminders that keep me moving forward. So that I may have the privilege of experiencing them again and again. Amidst the hurt and confusion of life, the smallest moments of light propel hope in a way that is sometimes still unbelievable to me in the macrocosm of existence. Being human is simply having hopes and dreams that will one day manifest life into something better than we already know. Attaining a lifestyle and mindset that trigger these little saviors of ours more often. May we always stand firm for those little giants - they are our catalysts for progress.
Always love.
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